Sunday, March 10, 2013

Sitting down & breathing

I have been so busy lately and I have to confess a bit, before I lead into what I want to write, is that I am a bit of a workaholic. I really do love what I do, and struggle to wind down and stop. I always have such urgency within me, I strive for perfection, and always have on mind that I need to do this, and I need to do that. To be honest it's not very healthy, and my husband always is saying, Kylie sit & relax. I manage to get everything done around my kids, they are never unhappy or miss out on anything, and I somehow incorporate my daily work, house hold chores, their activities & time with them. At the end of the day I am exhausted, & lately I have been thinking differently........

You are amazing

It's been a few days of intended soul searching, and it came to me while I had been reading a few of my favorite blogs, (this one & this one) which completely inspire me every day. They are almost like food for my soul, their success keeps me going. What I love most is their inspired ways with life, their gratitude, and how they allow themselves to be kind to themselves. I too have just realised that I just need to slow down and be a little kinder to me. I have realised in quite an enlightening way, that I don't have any time for me, well I do have time, I am just not giving myself any. I never sit and just be. I rarely sit and read anymore just for the sake of it. I dream of getting stuck into my house and redecorating it as I want, but I never give myself time for that. I cant remember the last time I went shopping alone. I have so many creative ambitions it kills me, I don't give myself that time to explore them.

I have decided it's time to change, I cant go cold turkey, but will be focused on positive changes bit by bit. A permanent change for me, needs to be gentle, I just can't change the switch over night. I am very excited about this personal revelation, and amazed at just how lighter I feel knowing I will be a little less highly strung, it's quite refreshing.

I am also making a few small changes within my business, nothing drastic, but little changes that will have me exploring other creative avenues. Avenues I am HIGHLY passionate about that make my heart sing and flutter. Please believe me I am not complaining here at all, not a bit, I do look at what I have done over the last 18 months, and I am very proud of what I have achieved. I get to work from home and live my dream of working for myself, and creating art every single day. I just haven't really given myself time to explore new creative changes, and I feel I need to as I have been having that nagging stale feeling. It's time for me to get excited, and time to stop feeling like the repetitious working robot I have been, and have some fun.

I look forward to sharing this journey.

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