Things I am doing this new year ....

With all of the chatter about new year resolutions, I am here to admit I don't do the damn things. I have tried & failed, so the last couple of years I just haven't bothered with them.

This year is a blank slate so I can decide to do it my way!!
Instead of new year resolutions, I want to focus on things that went really well in 2013 in my life, & how I can improve them.  I also want to try & go back to basics a bit & get back to my roots, that being my LOVE for drawing & design & why the hell I started with my business.
The last couple of years I feel like I have not stop pushing & pushing to make it grow & work. It got hard & a little robotic at times.

I have always read happiness & enjoyment manifest success, so in 2014 I am going to let the universe play a little part in my journey

Happiness & Gratitude.

I am a relatively happy person, I can get a little stressed & high strung at times (due to my perfectionism), & I am very grateful for my happy little life. But I would like to be a little happier, & not worry about the little things so much. When those low little grey thoughts creep into my mind, I want to change my mood, I really want to make an effort to shift them. Move them on. Kick them away. Say see you later. This may involve me going outside for a moment & breath some fresh air, get some sun on my face, look in my garden, cuddle my kids or walk puppy.

Turn a negative into a positive.

This relates to all aspects of life. We all have crappy days & all have even crappier little events take place. So when something goes wrong, I really want to see the positive side, you know see the glass more half full than empty. Even laugh about it.

Look for beauty.

Have you ever really sat down & looked around you? There is a lot of beauty from colours, to pattern to touch. This will also help with my inspiration. I admit to not doing it enough, it's time to sit a bit & take a look around.

Check in with my goals.

I get slack here, I have to admit this, I write them down & forget about them. But this year I have completed the amazing 2014 biz workbook by Leonie Dawson, which has been one of the best personal exercises I have ever done. Its not your typical business book, it is so much more. It's almost a declaration of your soul, thoughts, dreams, hopes, loves, hates & everything in between. I have written my dreams from loves to financial goals, in such a beautiful & soft way. It's creative & wonderful & so highly recommended. I have committed to myself to check in monthly & quarterly, & by not doing it will only let myself down. I feel so serious & committed to this process this year as I know it will help me grow & stay on track. Can't wait!!

Improve my running & fitness.

I worked very hard the last few months getting back into running, its be a hard journey, but so god damn rewarding. This year I aim to keep this maintained & even extend. I am aiming to run 8km this May at the annual Susan Mother's Day fun run. I feel scared & pray my knees hold up. To maintain this I have to improve my flexibility. My new goal this year is to limber up. Stretch, stretch & stretch. I am going to incorporate some yoga & Pilates to help. It's going to hurt, but I will so happy to be able to touch my toes without pain.

Be more caring & gentle with myself.

Basically stop pushing myself to my limits. No more burning the candle at both ends. My diet is fine I don't have an issue there, but I need to listen to me a little more. If I am tired go to sleep. It's pretty simple actually, a well slept me, is a happy me.

More Art

Retuning to what I love. I love to draw & create. Love. Love. Love. It makes me so happy. In 2013 I drew so much but it was under a lot of pressure. I was doing art classes plus churning out new designs for my business. Sometimes the pressure gave me a little stage fright, & I just couldn't get what I wanted out. This year I am dedicating a small amount of time several times a week to just draw. Just me, my sketch pad, pencil & eraser. It will be a doodling dream.

Get back to my roots.

Time to check in with why I started my business. Because I love to draw & I also love to inspire. I have a lot of friends & family come to me with ideas & plans & thoughts about things happening in their world. There is always a general consensus, they always tell me I inspire them, help them with ideas & suggestions they have never thought of. these conversations range from colour, to food, to fitness, to the garden & everything in between. I love bouncing ideas with people & brainstorming. With that reminder I am looking forward to infusing my daily life, business & personal with inspiration, which I hope can inspire others.

So there is where I want to go this year, & I look forward to the journey ahead.

Whats your 2014 plans?

Reaching goals I never thought would happen

About 16 months ago I had a double knee surgery, I had an arthroscopy procedure on both of my knees. Growing up I was a sports nut, I loved it, I still do. But the years of wear & tear well into my early 20's started to cause me pain. I no longer could squat, lunge or RUN which just devastated me. I accepted this as some kind of ageing process, & was told it's just wear & tear on my knees. I eased up on how intense my workouts were to accommodate this, but the slight pain increased, & my knees started to grind. It got to a point all I did was walk, which I find boring, & even to bend down to pick up the kids toys, even kneeling down on them was casing pain. I had so much treatment, physiotherapy, acupuncture, & loads of osteo, as well as taking lots of fish oil & glucosamine, but nothing worked.

I gave in & just stopped moving a lot, which made me annoyed, body conscious, lethargic & tired. I function at my best when I exercise. Eventually my dad got me into his GP who was also one of the doctors for Essendon Football club (my team!!). I figured surely he could help, if he treated professional athletes daily. So I went along, he felt & heard how my knees would grind & said it wasn't good, & sent me to a knee specialist who performs knee surgery. Mind you this happened 3 days after I met him, no waiting I suppose when your doctor has all the right professional contacts. YAY! As nervous as I was, I went with an open mind to see what he had to say. At the end of the day it was my choice as to what treatment I chose to undertake. 

My doctors name was Nigel, he was around my age which I found comforting, & he was gentle & understanding of my frustration. He examined my knees & told me with the grinding sound they were making, & the pain I described he knew I need an arthroscopy procedure. Suddenly I felt brave & said yes to proceed. I was so sick of the pain, I just couldn't deal with it anymore, & feeling so incapable of moving freely. Not just yes, but YES to both knees at once. He said are you sure,? You wont be able to move around much, & the fact I have 2 kids concerned him. Thankfully my mum didn't work, so that wasn't a problem, she could help me for a few days until I got mobile.

A few days later, (yes this happened super quickly) I was at the hospital, gowned up & ready to go. I was nervous but had a strange faith in him. He seemed a genuine & caring man, no eagerness to just cut into my knees. The surgery was key hole, two incisions in both side of my knees. I understood the procedure like this; He went in there & ground off all of the rough edges that were grinding against each other to clean it up, & remove what didn't need to be in there. Your knee & knee cap he described should be smooth like wet ice, very slippery. Both of mine were the opposite, bumpy & rough from wear & tear.

Afterwards I woke feeling fine. My knees all bandaged & I had to walk straight away. Man was I scared. But I did it, as awkward as it was. Recovery has taken me a while, as he told me they were worse than he had predicted, so had to be a little more aggressive on the left knee (my most painful), than on the right. It took a good 6 weeks to be walking normally again, & several months before I could bend my knee completely, that meaning pulling my ankle to my bum & stretching. I had to increase the flexibility of the muscles around my knee. I have taken it slowly & progressed with caution. My goal was to start moving more, & building the muscles up again once everything had settled. I wanted to start running again outside, so prior to this I had using a treadmill so it would help with impact, as it was safe, & flat, I did lots of interval running. Twelve months to the day (early September) I started running outside again. It was hard, always is compared to the treadmill. I didn't care about that, I knew I'd get there, but for the first time in what feels like FOREVER there is no pain. Words can no describe how amazing this is.

So slowly I got back into it with a goal to run 5km. Always in the back of my mind, I have been waiting for them to hurt again, but so far so good nothing. I have kept to safe foot paths or the road, not footy ovals or grassland, as I am paranoid I will find a pot hole & something will happen. Today on this beautiful sunny Melbourne day, (also a public holiday Melbourne Cup), I ran 5km with only three 30 seconds breaks. Sometimes the hills kill me & I need to recover as I am worried the next breath won't come. My legs hurt & feel heavy, but it's a great & normal pain. I would never have ever thought I would be able to achieve this. I am so happy & look forward to doing some fun runs in the future.

It's got me thinking about how amazing the mind is when you really want something. I have pushed to get to this day. It's hard, & some days I didn't feel like it but I didn't it anyway. I am starting to think if I have achieved this, what else is possible?? Whether it be running or other goals in my life.

Doing a happy dance!!

I love hearing about people goals, let me know what you have achieved when you thought it was impossible.

Feelings of change & being brave

Since May this year I have felt a real shift in my business & me especially. The way I think. The way I look at things. Ideas I have, & the direction I want to move in the future. Everything is positive & it excites me to my core. I absolutely love to illustrate & create, I just can't imagine doing anything else. I have worked so hard the last couple of years & have reached a stage where I know its time to grow & expand. I am far from bored, but feel the need to change a little. I have become a lot more grateful for the opportunities that I have created, & reflective of my accomplishments. I am learning also to smile about the good things that have happened with my business, & know its OK to do so. However I feel like this year is starting to become a time to focus on growing as a person, learning news skills & techniques, developing my business to the next level, & chasing my dreams.

Print by Jessica Swift

This print sums me up at the moment, it's perfect isn't it?

Being brave is what I need to be as I have some dreams at the moment which will force me to push myself out of my comfort zone, which is not always my happy place. As you know (I completed the MATS course), so I am working behind the scenes here building my portfolio up so I can submit my work to art directors looking for new opportunities. Eeeeek what a scary & exciting place!

I also would LOVE to start to get back into painting again. I haven't done it since college & I remember how much I loved it back then. I am really scared about this one as it's been years. I would LOVE to learn mixed media techniques also, but I do have one dilemma....kids! I just can not get paints & things out & concentrate (being the key word), & experiment when they are around. They are just way to interested in what mum is doing, & just hover around me & I just can't work. I would love some hints from those who manage that.

So there are a couple of new goals & dreams I have shared & can't wait to start sharing it as I progress along, who knows where it will end up.

My fitness journey....

A couple of weeks ago I decided enough is enough!!! I need to start feeling fantastic, not just mentally by physically especially.

I couldn't work out why I was losing my zing, even when I had a decent night sleep. As simple as my revelation may be, it dawned on me I am so unfit. Before I had Hudson I was & had always been quite fit & extremely healthy. Until your body has been in that state & then not, it becomes very obvious in all aspects of your life.

I have put on about 10kgs, some left over baby weight & a few chocolate bars more, hehe. I want to move it & have been trying very hard without any result but a lot of excuses. I am too tired, I am too busy, I can't with the kids, my knee is sore (which always is), I just need to relax. It wasn't even a new years resolution it was just a decision I made one morning as I was putting on my jeans which always feel firm on my waist. I knew this muffin top & I had to break this friendship.

So I have joined my local gym which is very shiny & brand new. It's 15min walk from home or 5min drive in the car leaving, no excuses for not getting there. It has a FREE crèche for the kids, as part of my membership. Both of my kids are quite clingy to me, but I have decided an hour of separation for us would be fine, they will cope & besides they will be together.

image from here

I have also bought 6 weeks of personal training sessions with a trainer to get me going & to help me towards my goal. To date I have had 3 classes with my trainer & all I will say is OMG!! OMG!! I can now see & understand why they are worth every cent they earn. I have never worked so hard in my life, or been so sore either. Normally if I was alone & it got too hard I wouldn't stop, but slow down to a more comfortable pace rather than pushing myself to make those changes my body needs. As hard as it's been I am enjoying it a lot.

Food....This is my week point. I have a reasonably good diet but my weakness, like most of us is that little piece of mouth watering chocolate, a sweet biscuit, a small bowl of ice cream later at night when you have the peckish urge. I am going to make a real attempt to kick that habit, that's right a habit!! Half the time I am not even hungry it's the sweet urge that over comes me that I give in to. I am getting a meal plan soon & will share what my trainers plan of attack will be. I have a hunch it will be less carbs & sugar & more protein & vegetables. I can cope with that, it's my chocolate love that will challenge me.

images from here

To date my weight is 75kgs (I can't believe I am writing this), I am 168.5cm tall & wear a size 12. Some may say not too bad, it's not horrendous but this is about a fitness journey, & a journey to give me that zing back. ENERGY ENERGY ENERGY is what its all about. I know for a fact the fitter you are the more you can handle as you have the energy to do it. I am looking forward to a few changes in my diet also, again I am going to be looking for foods to give me energy & make me full.

Wish me luck on my journey. Any tips from your own experiences would be lovely.

So here is my journey &